A Special Kind of Healing

There is one conclusion to every story. We all fall down.

There comes a point in almost everyone's life where we become seriously ill or suffer a time of great challenge. But there is a way to help heal our loved ones who are going through these experiences.

"The most common complaints about people who are seriously ill is that they feel alone," Dr. Diana Rehling says.

Rehling has taught classes on effective listening for over twenty years. She has experienced a serious illness herself which gave her a "new vantage point for thinking about the healing power of listening."

"I think one of the things you realize is that to a degree you are absolutely alone," Rehling says. "But my husband was very good about listening."

Rehling says she did not feel alone during her time of illness because her husband was by her side willing to listen with compassion.

"The great thing about my husband is that he was very supportive," Rehling says. "People who are seriously ill need someone who is generally accepting; recognizing there is nothing wrong with being ill. Being ill and passing away is what humans do."

Compassionate listening is different than therapeutic and empathetic listening. The objective of compassionate listening is recognition of our connectedness. 

Rehling explains in her paper, "Compassionate Listening: A Framework for Listening to the Seriously Ill" that compassionate listening/dialogue cannot be arranged before hand. It must be natural. 

In Rehling's paper, she  describes her experience with a serious illness and explains how compassionate listening has the power to heal.

The next time a loved one struggles with an illness, consider listening -- with compassion.

NOTE: I will have have a future post that will go into more depth on compassionate Listening in the near future.